Life After Death?
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Joined: Jul 2001
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From: Yorba Linda, CA
Originally posted by OverBooster
Again, heaven, the afterlife and living eternity is a creation of those who are afraid of death and no longer existing.
Again, heaven, the afterlife and living eternity is a creation of those who are afraid of death and no longer existing.
(You made the statement; please defend it.)
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 6,792
Likes: 4
For a limited time, send me 5 bucks and I will guarantee you entry into a land of eternal wonder land after you die.
A few of requirements:
Money must be paid in weekly installments, preferably on sundays. Those wishing an even better place in this wondrous land may also wish to make regular "donations", 10 percent of your income sounds about fair. The more you give, the more you will get. I'm everywhere, I see everything.
Even if your life is full of misery, accept it because, well, I work "in mysterious ways" and I keep track of such things, provided you continue to send me money and listen to that guy who speaks for me down at the building with a cross on it (alternatively if you live in a fiefdom, do what your king says, he speaks directly to me). I will remember these things when you die.
You must make a passing attempt to not be a total ass. Don't kill people, try not to steal, etc. Don't worry if you mess up now and then, I have conveniently built in a number of loopholes that allow these acts to be washed away -- as always, money speeds the process.
A few of requirements:
Money must be paid in weekly installments, preferably on sundays. Those wishing an even better place in this wondrous land may also wish to make regular "donations", 10 percent of your income sounds about fair. The more you give, the more you will get. I'm everywhere, I see everything.
Even if your life is full of misery, accept it because, well, I work "in mysterious ways" and I keep track of such things, provided you continue to send me money and listen to that guy who speaks for me down at the building with a cross on it (alternatively if you live in a fiefdom, do what your king says, he speaks directly to me). I will remember these things when you die.
You must make a passing attempt to not be a total ass. Don't kill people, try not to steal, etc. Don't worry if you mess up now and then, I have conveniently built in a number of loopholes that allow these acts to be washed away -- as always, money speeds the process.
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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 20,840
Likes: 0
From: Come see me after class.
Originally posted by steve c
For a limited time, send me 5 bucks and I will guarantee you entry into a land of eternal wonder land after you die.
A few of requirements:
Money must be paid in weekly installments, preferably on sundays. Those wishing an even better place in this wondrous land may also wish to make regular "donations", 10 percent of your income sounds about fair. The more you give, the more you will get. I'm everywhere, I see everything.
Even if your life is full of misery, accept it because, well, I work "in mysterious ways" and I keep track of such things, provided you continue to send me money and listen to that guy who speaks for me down at the building with a cross on it (alternatively if you live in a fiefdom, do what your king says, he speaks directly to me). I will remember these things when you die.
You must make a passing attempt to not be a total ass. Don't kill people, try not to steal, etc. Don't worry if you mess up now and then, I have conveniently built in a number of loopholes that allow these acts to be washed away -- as always, money speeds the process.
For a limited time, send me 5 bucks and I will guarantee you entry into a land of eternal wonder land after you die.
A few of requirements:
Money must be paid in weekly installments, preferably on sundays. Those wishing an even better place in this wondrous land may also wish to make regular "donations", 10 percent of your income sounds about fair. The more you give, the more you will get. I'm everywhere, I see everything.
Even if your life is full of misery, accept it because, well, I work "in mysterious ways" and I keep track of such things, provided you continue to send me money and listen to that guy who speaks for me down at the building with a cross on it (alternatively if you live in a fiefdom, do what your king says, he speaks directly to me). I will remember these things when you die.
You must make a passing attempt to not be a total ass. Don't kill people, try not to steal, etc. Don't worry if you mess up now and then, I have conveniently built in a number of loopholes that allow these acts to be washed away -- as always, money speeds the process.
And if you call within the next 15 minutes, we'll include this king-size Super Shammy totally free!
...
But wait, there's more! Use your credit card and we'll knock off 8 whole payments! That's right; use your credit card and you won't be charged until the 3rd month!
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