Every person is different. If you think love and monogamy is a farce, then you probably shouldn't be in relationships with women, because you're going to end up screwing them over, and that's going to #### it up for the rest of us.

Personally, I'd rather be in a monogamous relationship with someone I trust, rather than dating around with girls that are ####ing 10 other guys at the same time. Granted, there are enough people out there that are cheating on their significant others that it makes it extremely difficult to trust anyone these days, but that doesn't mean that's the way it should be or that this will become the 'norm' or 'acceptable.' It just means that there are a bunch of people out there that are too selfish and don't have the strength of character to be faithful and stick to the vows they make at marriage.

If you want to be in an open relationship, cool. Just be upfront with the person/people that you're with. That way, when things end badly, at least they can't say they didn't know and they can't claim that all guys are cheating assholes. The fact of the matter is that there are guys out there that are faithful, but unfortunately the assholes get to all of the decent girls first and mess up their heads.

 

Gotrice, I don't NEED a woman right after I sleep with her but it's nice to cuddle after. More and more women want to be completely independent of a man, yes, but it doesn't mean you should through monogamy out the window. There are still women out there who would appreciate it. Just don't go looking for it. And I didn't see anything about morals in whiteflash's post.

OP, just go out and make women friends. Some will date you, some won't. It doesn't matter; it's about your frame of mind. Don't be a negative nancy, be a positive patty. Your quality of life goes up a lot when you start being happy with what you have vs what you don't.

mxt, nail on the head.

 

In this thread
-guys who are bitter about past relationships will bitch about them
-guys who want to act like macho studs will pretend they couldn't possibly be monogamous
-a few guys with good relationships will talk about how awesome they are

I feel like we've had this thread before.

 

^ I feel like I might've been responsible for discussions of this nature on several occasions in the past.

 

and trust is where the problem lies. i've been burned before in other non-romantic relationships and have since learned not to trust anyone, but i let my gaurd down for her. it's up to me to say never again, but i wanted to hear some other perspectives.

 

then you might be exactly who i'd like to hear from!

 

I am none of the above.

Not bitter (anymore), can be monogamous and not currently in a relationship.

But yes, this topic has come up quite a few times.

 

OP,

all women are different and just cause one screwed you over doesn't mean they all will. I just got out of a 4 year relationship which ended because she cheated. Right now I'm just enjoying being single, doing what I want. I'm not looking for anyone but if I happen to meet someone then I won't pass up on the oppurtunity because of what one person did to me in the past. It wouldn't be fair to that new girl because of the actions of a past relationship. I think it's important to learn from your past experiences and apply them to any new encounters you face. Don't give up on the possibility of a new girlfriend.

 

What about a 65 year old who constantly yaps about "my girl friend" this and "my girl friend" that...who invites all two of his ex-wives and the "girl friend" to the same Thanksgiving dinner table (is this normal)? Oh, yeah, he still has the picture of his very first wife somewhere at the bottom of the drawer. Is this guy a stud or his he just a short man with a short-man's complex? I don't know.

 

Spot on. Speaking from experience, there's no point on dwelling on the past, feeling sorry for yourself. You'll become a romantic anachronism as the rest of the world moves on. Learn from your mistakes (although it may not be your fault 100% of the time) and apply your new found knowledge to future prospects. It may seem like that girl was the best you could ever find, but in the end things came to a close for a reason. Yes, it sucks, but sometimes you just have to wait for time to bring you acceptance and you learn to trust again.
As for monogamy becoming a tradition of the past, I think that is a ridiculous notion. For those guys that thing everything is about superficial motives then I don't even know what to say