Granted, but you become so strong that everything you touch breaks.

I wish my girlfriend would stop nagging at me.

 

Granted, you are now single

I wish good food didn't take so long to prepare.

 

granted, good food can be prepared quickly, but it costs boucou bucks. unfortunately, you become addicted to good food b/c it can be prepared so quickly, that you become obese and broke, forcing you to eat crappy food and then you die of malnutrition.

i wish the next season of "24" would take place on a day when daylight savings kicks in, so that we'd get an extra episode (i.e., it would actually be "25")

 

Granted, but now all that comes on TV are epiosodes of 24!!!

I wish college were a lot easier.

 

Your wish is granted. College is a breeze, but you are unable to find suitable work or a salary that pays enough to make even the simplest ends meet, much less pay off all your school loans.

I wish Honda Racing F1 trounces the competition and wins the 2006 season.

 

You wish is granted. Honda Racing F1 team wins the 2006 season, but will continue to lose each and every season after that.

I wish our cars didn't cost so much to mod to make the car fast.

 

Granted, cheap mods make more hp than the drivetrain can handle and you destroy your ring and pinion, your axles, and the rest of your drivetrain the first time you drive it.

I wish I had a race prepped s2k to run in SCCA's Honda Cup series.

 

Granted your car has been race prepped as requested

It has also been sprayed glitter-pink and sponsored by a leading gay pr0n magazine.

I wish I had a purpose-built garage big enough for 20 cars with a full workshop, and enough money to fill it with exotic supercars.

 

Granted. You turn your house into a garage for the cars and spend every last dime on the exotics. You now have to live inside of the cars.

I wish I was married to Elizabeth Hurley and her not have STDs, not crippled, not has had a sex change and she is willing to have hot sex with me anytime I wanted.

That should cover my bases.

 

Never assume.

YOU have the sex change, and can't feel a thing, and end up frustrated beyond belief. (Plus you spend the rest of your life in the bathroom by yourself).

I wish Spring Break was 2 week long.