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new ideas for marriage

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Old Feb 16, 2007 | 12:22 AM
  #1  
dyhppy's Avatar
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Default new ideas for marriage

first off, i've never been married so im no authority.

with the divorce rate being so high (and even higher in california), drastic measures seem to be needed. through some readings and research, it appears that married people dont enjoy being around each other much. that goes for sharing a bed, bathroom and in one unique case, an apt. there was a couple in new york who lived next door to each other in separate apts and they LOVED it AND their married friends were jealous. the women were like "you mean you dont have to see his gross hair all over the floor!" etc.

so what if a happy couple early on decided to take measures not to encroach on each other's space and get on their respective nerves:

separate beds, bathrooms, and if they can afford it, dont live together.

go so far as to spend lots of time away from each other acting like individuals and making the heart grow fonder.

in addition, encourage talk about attractive people each notices so as to not begin to hide things from each other.

i know it doesn't sound like the fairy tale you grew up with, but...

thoughts?
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Old Feb 16, 2007 | 12:35 AM
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Only in America. Americans, in terms of marriage, for lack of a better term, are usually clueless. They get married....

1)Too young

2)Too fast

3)For fun

4)Spur of the moment

5)Divorce is normal here

6)Its not valued here.

etc etc...I can go on all day.

Your version literally, makes marriage, just a legal piece of paper.
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Old Feb 16, 2007 | 04:39 AM
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@ the OP - with regards to your comments about marriage, to me that is the purpose of dating. I don't want to marry someone I've never lived with or couldn't live with, but then again I don't want to live with someone I'm not engaged to (it's a personal preference).

I'd say that I agree with NFR - marriage has become "the next logical step" for a lot of people instead of "the thing they want to do" - it's a societal norm and it's become expected that after multiple years of dating, you'll talk about, and eventually get, married.
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Old Feb 16, 2007 | 05:07 AM
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Originally Posted by NFRs2000NYC,Feb 16 2007, 04:35 AM
Only in America. Americans, in terms of marriage, for lack of a better term, are usually clueless. They get married....

1)Too young

2)Too fast

3)For fun

4)Spur of the moment

5)Divorce is normal here

6)Its not valued here.

etc etc...I can go on all day.

Your version literally, makes marriage, just a legal piece of paper.
Not "only in america":
from : http://www.divorcemag.com/statistics/statsWorld.shtml
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Old Feb 16, 2007 | 05:15 AM
  #5  
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Originally Posted by NFRs2000NYC,Feb 16 2007, 03:35 AM
Only in America. Americans, in terms of marriage, for lack of a better term, are usually clueless. They get married....

1)Too young

2)Too fast

3)For fun

4)Spur of the moment

5)Divorce is normal here

6)Its not valued here.

etc etc...I can go on all day.

Your version literally, makes marriage, just a legal piece of paper.


I "dated" my wife for 6 years before we got married. We both wanted to be ready for it instead of jumping into it. Mine happens to be my best freind as well which seems to be a rare thing... why would you want to share the rest of your life with someone who you don't like hanging out with?
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Old Feb 16, 2007 | 05:30 AM
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From: Erock's my boat!
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Originally Posted by NFRs2000NYC,Feb 16 2007, 04:35 AM
Only in America. Americans, in terms of marriage, for lack of a better term, are usually clueless. They get married....

1)Too young

2)Too fast

3)For fun

4)Spur of the moment

5)Divorce is normal here

6)Its not valued here.

etc etc...I can go on all day.

Your version literally, makes marriage, just a legal piece of paper.
werd.
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Old Feb 16, 2007 | 05:30 AM
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Originally Posted by Vadster,Feb 16 2007, 09:15 AM
why would you want to share the rest of your life with someone who you don't like hanging out with?
werd.
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Old Feb 16, 2007 | 05:40 AM
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Originally Posted by Vadster,Feb 16 2007, 09:15 AM
why would you want to share the rest of your life with someone who you don't like hanging out with?
because this someone is hot and/or has $$
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Old Feb 16, 2007 | 05:43 AM
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People need to think a little more independantly about marriage. I think that the evolution of man has made marriage counter to instinct. But I think it can still be great and fulfilling for a good many people. But not everyone. Yet, nearly everyone feels a need to "settle down" with one person "forever", and then finds that they shouldn't have.

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Old Feb 16, 2007 | 05:44 AM
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My wife (of nearly 28 years) is my best friend, and those of you who know me know that I'm not the easiest person to be around at times.
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