Granted, S2000raj gets a sex change with his new occupation, and you get him, er, her.

I wish this year was a leap year.

 

Granted. To accomodate your (very stupid) wish, God slows down the Earth's rotation to allow an extra day in February tomorrow, but doesn't bother to return it to normal speed for next year, the entire western hemisphere is eventually left in a state of total darkness, leading to crop failure and mass hysteria.

I wish I had two dollars for every dollar I've ever been in debt for

 

"I wish I had two dollars for every dollar I've ever been in debt for"

Granted, but the bank accidently gives you mexican "dollars"(aka Peso's) so now you have less than you thought you where gonna get, and you go off and try to convert your "dollars" into U.S. "dollars" but accidently convert to Euros, so now you end up owing the bank more than before



I wish that i had mad baller skills

 

Granted... you buy tons of Mugen shit for your car and are now broke.


I wish this thread will never die!!!

 

Granted:
The thread doesn't die, because I continue to post in it... unfortunately, you now have to read the stupidity that I write... sucks to be you

I wish "Sucks to be you" becomes a known phrase that eventually replaces the more commonly known "Goodbye"

 

granted, but everyone takes "sucks to be you" to heart and commits suicide, ending the human race.

i wish the more junk food i ate, the healthier i became.

 

granted, your health is immaculate, yet your teeth rot and fall out. you catch a rare advanced form of gum disease, and nobody will get withing 7.93 feet of you. nasty bastard.

I wish I could quit engineering, grow 5 more inches, and resume my instantly successful basketball career, without injury.

 

Granted, but when you grow taller your penis shrinks and eventually dissapears and you become a professional baller in the WNBA.

I wish I would hear positive news about the job I applied to.

 

Granted, the positive news is overheard by you while being given to the other person who got the job.

I wish someone would lock this damn thread.

 

Granted. I lock this thread, but then I unlock it because it's more annoying.

I wish i was getting a BJ right now.