Yeah, usually it refers to being laced with angel dust, and sometimes cocaine.

 

Granted, but P-Diddy produces them and everyone thinks that it doesn't suck. But it does...

I wish the bar I go to would have secret .50 draft specials (of good beer) for me only and no one knows about it but me and the bar.

 

Granted, It is now $20 to enter the restroom while consuming 'secretly' priced beer.

I wish I did not have to shave every day.

 

Granted. You're a girl. (Quit staring at your naked self in the mirror!)

I wish the human body was 75% beer instead of water, and it was a requirement for survival.

 

Granted, but because of that beer does not intoxicate you, water does and the ridiculous price of bottled water goes up even more.

I wish I could ride a motorcycle and never get in an accident.

 

Granted, Your tired one day so your girlfriends driving for you and she crashes into an 18 wheeler and you end up dead while you girlfriend walks away with a broken nail.

I wish that women would pleasure me with a simple snap of my fingers.

 

granted, but unfortunately for you, the area you live has bikers that are mainly fat women with ass cracks that show as they ride which means you're not cool


I wish i could pass all my exams with an A

 

Granted, but A stands for asshole.

I wish I hadn't believed that Canadian whiskey wouldn't make me drunk, because... oooo baby. I'm gonna be hung over tomorrow.

Edit: wsha th e thte yteio!!!

 

granted but you drank it anyway..

I wish that I had more space on my hard drive for p0rn

 

Granted, Your hard drive is now expanded to 1000GB's , but your mom catches you with all your $$$$$$ and gives you a big whooping.

I wish that my big red disgusting looking pimple near my eye would vanish right now.