Granted, but now one grows on the tip of your nose.

I wish I could sleep all night tonight without being awakened.

 

granted but you wake up to sharpie ink all over your face.

I wish i could finish this quiz so i can go to sleep

 

Granted, but your mind is so at ease the quiz is done that you oversleep by almost a day, missing class and the opportunity to turn in your paper.

I wish there wasn't a formal investigation launched on me at work.

 

Granted, instead aliens land on earth and do a formal investigation of your rectum.

I wish I could sleep right now even if I wake with sharpie on my face.

 

Granted, you wake up wrapped in electrical tape.

I wish that tolls on major interstates/turnpikes were free.

 

granted, now you only pay tolls in town before turning into any parking lots.

I wish the police would stop pulling me over EVERY time I drove my s2000 past 2am.

 

*drive

 

(in downtown Philly all the parking lots DO have tolls)

Granted, the police pull you over every time you drive before 2am.

I wish I took the day off today.

 

granted, you take the day off and find out tomorrow that anyone who showed up to work at your company today received a sweet bonus, but it was only a one-time deal.

i wish i had michael schumacher's driving skills.

 

granted but you're stuck driving cars with no more than 100 horsepower for the rest of your life

I wish for breakfast