Granted, Complete world peace reigns over Earth. No crime in any form. Now all the people that used to make a living on crime/illegal acts are out looking for 'legit' jobs. While all the people that would be used in War/military, law enforcement, foreign relations etc. are out jobs and looking. The world sees poverty on a macro scale never before thought possible.

I wish for a miracle.

 

Dear God that is the funniest/scariest shit I have read in a while.


I can't touch it

 

Granted, Your crippled neighbor can now walk, he then runs over to your house and beats you to death with his crutches to get back at you for making fun of him all his life.

I wish that I was married to Kate Beckinsale ( Actress in Underworld 1 and 2 )

 

Granted but she gains tremendous weight and stars in a Discovery Health Channel special: The 900lbs Woman; Kate's Story

I wish BJ Penn would have won his fight tonight

 

Granted, However you where his openent. You lasted a long time, but basically got youre arse whooped real good and lost.

I wish that Coke never changed their recipe (When was that, in the 80's?)- So there was no need to come out with 'Coca-Cola Classic'. There would only be "Coke".

(edit - Yeah I was in 'the zone' when I came home from poker last night. I'm rather proud of my world peace response TBH. I love it when I actually manage to make myself smile )

 

Wish granted, but since the name change never happened, Pepsi took over the market and Coke went under.

I wish cars came with auto pilot so I could sleep on my commute to and from school. (an hour one way)

 

Granted, but autopilots like driving your car so much you never get to drive your own car again.

I wish these frigging tax forms were simple!

 

Granted, anything to do with deductions are removed to 'stream line' the process.

I wish I could control myself around girl scout cookies.

 

Granted, but all other things edible disappear and your stuck with nothing but girl scout cookies.


I wish I didn't have to make a wish.

 

Granted, But because those are the rules of the game you are banished!

I wish zero gravity rooms existed and you can 'rent' it out for $10/hour.