Granted. You get to work on time and overhear what everyone REALLY thinks of your sorry ass.



I wish that my girlfriend's cat would behave at the vet this afternoon.

 

Granted. However, your girlfriend is now misbehaving, and not in that fun way. You may want to find your bags. . .

I wish for Tokyo_James to check in.

 

Granted, but now he acts like Wickster.



I wish people who hate Vista, actually try Vista (its still no Apple)

 

Granted, tried it, it sucked. on a vista capable machine it took longer to load the same apps as xp, and they didn't have a WORKING driver for the sound/video card for months like they claimed they did. face it, xp is better than vista. and leopard is so far ahead of vista in functionality, and ease of use. it took far less $$$ to make. it makes me sick microsoft spent so much time and money on a pile of crap. and no, no matter what you want to think, you can't polish a turd. just face it already, and quit trying to justify that $2000 computer that is slower and gives you more headaches than the $1000 computer you bought 4 years ago.


I wish to have a stroker kit for my s2000.

 

Granted. A 15 year-old male Philli-exican 'stroker' now rides in your S with you.

I wish Vista-haters would just simmer down. After all, it works for enough other folks...

 

Granted, prozac for people who didn't go service pack 1 and look for new drivers.

I wish I had one more straw for the camel's back

 

Granted. Now the camel is an invalid and he sues you for assault. He wins.


I wish I was at the beach instead of at work.

 

Granted, you are at the beach and a class 5 hurriaine comes through and wipes you out.


I wish my teeth weren't hurting.

 

Granted. You get in a fight with a 6'6 black guy named Kimbo and he knocks all your teeth out. Now the only thing hurting is your gums.



I wish I shot blanks and didn't have to wear a jimmy hat.

 

Granted, but your balls fall off from being so light and women decide not to have sex with a ball-less freak.

I wish I had a hundred billion dollars without anything bad happening.