Has already been wished and corrupted.



I wish Raj would get it together.

 

THere's no corrupting that...it ain't gonna happen.


I wish I could eat dinner in Pasadena tonight with Currahee and Raptor.

 

Granted. You eat together and they stick you for the bill which includes their month-long tabs.


I wish I had another beer.

 

Granted. Enjoy the cool refreshing taste of Natty Light.

I wish for another Diet Dr. Pepper.

 

Granted, a whole case, but it all tastes like Dr. Pepper...diet


I wish they made a Vernors "strong"

 

Granted but now you can't handle it.



I wish it would stay cloudy but not rain.

 

Granted. You now live in Tacoma. Watch for the methheads.


I wish for my pockets to be filled potato chip crumbs.

 

Granted, but now you pockets are so heavy that you go on disability, and move to tacoma and take meth, to fit in.

I wish I had a less feist and more thompson machine gunner on my one disk player...

 

Granted. You're now listening to Ronnie Thompson, and are gaining adulation from all sorts of interesting people.

I wish to write my memoirs now, while I haven't slipped into complete parody of myself.

 

Granted, you write your memoirs, and then you die a slow and painful death whilste being unable to communicate in any way. the only way for you to survive is to move to Apache Junction and do meth. you start stealing copper and catalytic converters. while stealing copper one night a cop startles you ad you cut the high voltage wire. you are shocked almost till death. the police officer approaches. you are too methed out of your mind to remember that help is already there, so you reach for your phone to call for help, the officer assumes you are reaching for a gun, and shoots you in the spine. you stand trial for stealing large amounts of copper and catalytic converters. you are also pinned with plenty of damage, and even crimes you didn't commit. you are sentenced to serve 30 years for being a maggot and a drain on society. while in jail the ENTIRE 300 inmates pounds your butt everyday. you have no choice but to take it like the whore you are because you are a quadriplegic. you serve you duty to society and after 30 years of bad meals, cold nights, and being ass raped rougly 3,287,250 times, you push your tongue forward to move your electric chair through the gates and out to freedom. while driving your electric scooter home your ass is killing you from a nasty mix of clamidia, herpes, and ghanoria that the inmates gave to you as a going away present. you try to take a short cut to the hospital through downtown and you run into some old meth addict friends of yours. they beat the hell out of you and steal the copper windings out of the motors on your scooter. they also cut out the battery as the lead would be worth a hit as well. they leave you in a back alley for days. you rott away in the sun, beaten, bruised, and bloody, until you finally die. your diing though is, that you did actually slip into a parody of yourself, being a sex slave to thousands of men over the years.

I wish 8d would take it easy on me after that one.