granted, but hugh clones himselfs and never dies.

I wish i had nicer shoes.

 

Granted. Enjoy your 4-inch Prada stiletto's.

I wish there were no speed limits on SoCal freeways

 

Granted, but you are only allowed to drive a John Deere.

I wish I was the strongest man in the world.

 

granted, but all the women become she-hulks, and the weakest one is 10x stronger than you.

I wish john deer started making s2000's

 

Granted, and you get run over by one at the tractor trade show and die


I wish it was summer already.

 

summary of noteworth wishes:

all pointless hatred ceased to exist
Honda stopped producing the S2000
Elvis is alive!
WRX's dont have glass transmissions
Nothing exists...
All weekends are four days long
racism has ended
Beer is good for you
REDEYE is a really good movie
The NBA All star game means everything
CRACK is NOT addictive at all.
World hunger is no more.
It is warm this week
There is world peace
Bin Ladin gave up peacefully
S2ki's search function works perfectly
S03's last a long time
George lucas released ep. 4-6 'unmolested'
EQ2 doesnt have downtime and works great
Everyone speaks english
The thread stops
Diet Coke tastes just like Classic Coke
Female figure skaters are NAKED!!
You can drive from cali to japan
Its always friday
Vinsanity is a circus elephant that works for peanuts
VR works like holodecks in StarTrek
women are not allowed to drive
its always 5:30EST
Squirrels dont jump in front of s2000s
bikinis are considered appropriate office attire for women who look good in them.
people arent stupid
William Hung is DEAD!
Ignorance is not bliss
California does not have speed limits on freeways
John Deere makes s2000s
Its always summer

 

summary of noteworth grants:


The world is full of dragstrips
all hatred suddenly has a point and everyone dies
s2000raj dreams about gay sex with Tom Cruise and a male escort arrived at his house
prodigy3006 is a famous gay pron star, also has met Mr. Jolie, Mr. Alba, Mr. Hilton, and Mr. Theron.
Uber-s2k spends 35 years behind bars with a guy named Buba
Aliens land and take over Earth enslaving mankind in the process
Elvis has an odd habit of feeling up Uber-s2k's girlfriend
WRX's have jello based transmissions
VoIPA's grandpa copped a feel on his nads.
honda introduces the s3000! much improved over the s2000. 400hp, able to coner at 2G's with street tires. 1/4 at 9 sec, 300,000mile/ 30 year warranty. capable of out running lambo, for $10,000 less than the S2000.
riceburners2001 looks like jay leno
Yoda is addicted to cocaine
all of existence is negated, leaving nothing
all of the world is colorblind
Simpsons is canceled.
beer does not contain alcohol
west coast NBA allstars rule the world
Jen Anniston is a man.
Chuck norris can kick Bruce lee's ass
everybody dies in a freak virus outbreak
jack bauer loves hairy man sex during his off hours
S-03's are hard as rocks
George Lucas goes into exile
it's Friday every day
vinsanity is the most eligible GAY bachelor in America
gosixers215 has a cellmate named Bubba
vinsanity has a 2 inch penis
After 2 days of world peace, world war 3 erupts
r_duff doesn't have any basketball skills
Every male is fired for sexual harassment, nothing gets done, the world plunges in the the dark ages again
cvc2nr knows why gay men like to have anal sex and becomes overwhelmed with the feeling
Everyone is now a genius
r_duff wears 4-inch Prada stiletto's.
all women become she-hulks

 

Granted, Its now Summer, but its -5 degrees below zero outside.

I wish that I could list all the girls that I want in my head and have them come to life so I can do them anytime I want to.

 

granted. but as one comes to life, the other dies, so you end up with a pile of dead girls in your bedroom.

I wish cops were cooler.

 

Granted, Cops now sport platinum chains, and have vertical doors.

I wish I had a white girlfriend.